Who Am I ? akiss2desire is a Bible Belt Blogging Bi Big Beautiful Babe who has been sharing her writing, mostly 1st person lesbian erotica, short stories, poetry, and lesbian pop culture realizations from both the experience and fantasy perspectives to an ever growing audience. I recently passed a million page views ! Thanks for the nominations for the Lezzie awards honoring best lesbian erotica on the web.

Those who have come here regularly know that I have taken a bit of a hiatus from posting and publishing, but my past work is still here and if you are new here there is much to be consumed. I am working on several stories right now and writing from the same mix of experience and fantasy that readers have told me they loved.

Those stories will be the foundation of my upcoming compilation book. Today, you get to read for free. Welcome, and I hope you stay awhile.

Sunday

Another Q and A for akiss2desire


For this blog post, questions I have answered in the sex forum of Shy-Bi .  I am glad to answer any questions or offer advice if I think I can help you at akiss2desire@gmail.com

What is the weirdest thing you ever used to get off ?

WOw ..reading through this was a revelation to me...because about 6 years ago I blogged about "My lover Jim, the pillow," and if you read it you'd gather that I pretty much thought I was the only one who had her first orgasm grinding, or "making out with"  a pillow with my 5th grade crush whose name was Jim. (I didn't realize I was bi / lesbian until I was 12) ...soon I was just putting the pillow down there...and because it was rubbing it raw I could only fuck my pillow every other night.   On the nights when I knew I was going to get to do the pillow thing, I honestly could not wait for night to go to bed.

I also did something in class that in retrospect I can't believe a teacher didn't notice.  I used to put a pencil under my desk between the underside of the desk and my crotch, and could make slight movements to stimulate my clit.   

I don't think it fits the catagory of weird, but when I figured out the power of the handheld shower head, I became a devotee to this day.  

So the weirdest thing ?   In the bathtub I used an empty shampoo bottle to apply gentle suction on my clit.  I would squeeze just a little water out of the full of water shampoo bottle and put it against me, where I could alternate between gentle suction as the bottle took my ever engorging clit inside it, and then squeezed the bottle to gush water ...couldn't come that way but GAWD it felt good when I was young...wonder if I might repeat that today to remember ?
 

What’s your favorite sex position with a woman?
My favorite position I wish had a name.  I would describe it as an offset 69.  I like to turn myself upset down on the bed so I am going down and fingering on her from above, But I am not sitting on her face ..rather just to her side where I invite her to finger me while I am doing her with my mouth.  I tell her "just touch me ..keep my pussy interested ...but don't try to make me come that way while I am eating you ...let me do the work and you enjoy the pleasure ..which becomes MY pleasure." 

What kind of girls do you like to see in lesbian porn ?

Large natural breasts with feminine women and more than anything ...believability.  As a viewer its so hard for me to ignore the fact that a camera crew is there and that the women are getting paid ...however, and it's rare, when they have me believing that the pleasure is real, the orgasms are real and the affection is genuine, I am immersed and come right along with them. 

What first Lesbian Experience Moment Stood Out For You
Mine was when I was 18 a woman who was 26 and had been a student teacher of mine a few years before ...we had become acquaintances and then friends and were pursuing each other for several months before IT  finally happened. There are descriptions by everyone on here about what women do with each other ...and yes we did some of those things...(making out, fingering, oral, lots of boob play) but my major memory was when I realized I was dressing myself and fixing my hair and makeup for a date with a woman and that we were probably about to have sex ...MY first time with a woman.  When I was getting ready I was probably as excited as any time in my life ...with a WIDE range of emotions from trembling to the other side of the spectrum in total confidence that I was READY, and just praying that I was right that this was IT. . It was a morning rendezvous and  when I showed up at her door, she was still in her frumpy morning attire,  there was no doubt in her mind I was there and dressed to entice her....that the message I was sending was "I'm ready if you are."  

.The next "moment" for me was when I was between her legs and just getting ready to lower my head into her muff.  After years of fantasizing it was FINALLY going to happen. I was aware of every sense imaginable.   Visually ---it was a bit shocking at first to be sooooo up close to another woman's vagina, certainly a soft smell of her excitement, touch ...as I had fingered her gently and knew how wet she was for me, and how time almost stood still for that moment before I went down. That freeze frame is forever etched in my mind, as was the moment a minute later when I realized how much at home I was giving oral pleasure to a woman I cared about.  

So thats my first time  "Moment"  (actually didn't limit to one did I ?  Sorry) and I am curious to know what freeze frames from YOUR first time stay with you forever.  If you haven't done it, what are you most looking forward to ??.   

What is the strangest place you have masturbated?
First thing that comes to mind is in my car while driving home from work.

Wednesday

Our First lesbian Kiss at work in the office - a poetic conversation


I am about to kiss you
you are
"yes i are" I tease," and im hoping you will kiss me back"
and she surprises me by replying, "ive been waiting forever for two things
one..for you to kiss me
and two to kiss you back
and theres a three......but that comes later"

I lean to her ..she leans to me
softly-"you smell so good."
softly "so do you"
we kissed 
"...ive been waiting forever for you to do that" she reiterated
"why didnt you tell me?"
"what took you so long?"
I peck at her lips,, "i dont know....but i dont want to stop"

and we kiss and kiss and kiss so deep, warm and wonderful.
"if you have a suggestion ..its time you make it"
(what she always said in a business setting to me to let me decide what we were both thinking)

"I hope we aren't making a mistake," I say thinking ..office lesbian romance is probably not the best thing for one's career
"its too late" as she opens her mouth so wide to fully invite my tongue as sensuously deep at it shall go.

Very deep kiss

reaching for her soft breast
a soft sigh of release...I never ever tire of a lovers reaction to my touch

ever done this?

uh uh (no) you ?

mmmm hmmm (yes)

I thought so

Sunday

Akiss2desire - Lesbian Dear Abby :)



Girl talk ..something I admit I don't get much of anymore....I really miss the open girl talk from high school and up to my early 20's.  It hasn't gone completely away, but the girl talk I used to love is non-existent to me.  One of the things I told a friend in high school is that she was my "sexual confessor."   We told each other about every every everything that happened ...it would take more time to tell what a boy did to us than probably the actual event LOL.  I think the readers of my blog are now my  collective "sexual confessors."  

A sweet and sincere girl whom I will call “Marie” asked me for advice and lend my “2 cents worth” on her situation. Hers is a relationship, and as I chime in I realize that I have not yet had a “normal” lesbian relationship because so much of my life is in the shadows.  I like when I am consulted by readers and trusted by women I have only met through my words here. But, my real world lesbian relationship experience is most definitely not typical, so that must be known.  But, as in the case of this particular lady, so many lesbian women feel they have nobody to talk to about this stuff.


Is it normal for your nipples to hurt after they get sucked on?
But the Girl Talk...I like the bonding.  If I can I will be someone who will listen and weigh in with what I know, especially about sex.   ..I have three good perspectives on lesbian sex ...first is the real experiences I have had (and hope to have more of ) ..second is the near semi-obsession I have with lesbian sexual subjects on the internet ...and the way I have filtered it.  In fact, I think that I am no longer offended by the “sex is all you ever think about” accusation, because it is something I have to own now.  I have ready the definition of nymphomaniac over and over and considered that it’s a term I can’t escape from, whether or not the nymphomaniacal me is in spirit or in practice. .   And now, with more than half a million lifetime hits on this website, I think I can claim that I am at least a “popular” lesbian blogger.  But, my how I have grown as a lesbian erotica writer in these years.  If anyone goes back to my first year of writing on the blog, I worked hard not to use the dirtiest words...I wouldn't even write the word "pussy" ...finally, a published writer who became a mentor  caught on and after I submitted one of my stories she didn't think the “using polite words”  was such the endearing quality I thought it was.  So now I say pussy pussy pussy pussy LOL.   It is what it is.  

So Marie states
So, I think I mentioned that my girlfriend is my first relationship. Well, she's my first everything. She was my first kiss (other than kissing boys as a little kid), everything we do together is my first, and hopefully my first sexual partner. Now with school coming up, it’s about to be a long distance relationship.  She's been in one other relationship, which was with a girl.  She had sex with this girl, and has done other stuff with guys (not sex), but no relationship with them..  
Okay, first question: How did you know you were ready the first time you had sex? I didn't want to go all the way with her because I thought it would be harder for us to be apart. The next time I can see her is for one day in March and then in the summer. I might try and drive down to her this weekend, but that's 5 hours and when I go to school it will be around 10. So now, I'm regretting not doing it when we were together. I talked to her about it and she says it's okay. Actually, what she said  was really sweet. 


Something to know is that she is experienced...so likely there was enough about the experience to continue to pursue love and sex with someone like you   One of my first thoughts is that if you are a virgin ...she is waiting for YOU to give her the go ahead for whatever is next ...it probably means what you both have is pretty deep.

I don't know what she said that was really sweet ..but again...clearly this is a deeper than just sex relationship for her and also for you.  It sounds like you KNOW that there is alot more to this kind of love than the whiz bang of climax...more about that later. 


I feel really confused because I don't feel like I have a strong sex drive. I'm worried that I'm not actually going to be able to do it, to go down on her or let her do it to me. I might not even get off, which she'll notice... I have a lot of anxieties about the whole sex thing, mainly not knowing what to do..
I think you know that if you talk to me about this ..and I am the one you are talking to besides her ..that as long as she says its ok for YOU to choose when you are ready, then THAT is the thing.  There is something you said which is why I DO feel qualified to give advice ...you say you won't know ..or don't know if you will know what to do...well...When you are in the "bubble" with someone you make love with, there is just almost no doing it wrong.   The things that can get in the way are things like incompatibility ..I am not compatible with someone who wants to go at it rough for one example, and there are plenty of others. But ..when there is kindness, compassion and caring for your partner...you are most likely to give totally and receive equally.  If this process is proceeding slowly with you, I think thats normal...a first sex experience can happen in one night...but it can also proceed over the course of a few times together as you get more comfortable with each other ....familiar.  


There are only two things that get me excited. One is when she sucks on my ears and the other is when she moans. She was rubbing herself against me in my car (tribbing I guess?) and I got so turned on, same when I am on top of her rubbing my thigh or hip into her clit.  Nothing makes me want to fuck more than hearing her moan into my ear. Well, except maybe when she says "God I want you", "You drive me insane" and "mmm fuck" LOL. But that's all. I'm not terribly excited when she touches me, like I don't think about it leading to sex. I guess I just like hearing her.

Well first of all..thats a very honest, and quite erotic paragraph ...vivid .  You describe two things that are right at the top of the list for me.  Feeling her reaction to what I am doing to her ...and in this case...you describe to me that the act of making out with you is apparently doing it quite nicely for her.  It sounds like she is getting off getting you off...and that sounds alot like something I can relate to. On your side...telling me how it gets to you to hear that means to me I think you are in the moment ...so let me get to something you asked..when do you KNOW the time is right ...well...to me...the time is already right for all you are doing ....whatever comes next is a matter of everyone's comfort zone..and accept that if that comfort zone isn't right to either of you...it doesn't need to be forced.   Let me add that it sounds like you are understanding that PART of expressing your closeness to her ...you think..should involve sex....TALKING with her ...not only in notes or on phone or chat...but also in the act ...helps you both get to the point you both want to get to ...and compromise happens in life both in and out of bed. 

So second question. Is it normal for your nipples to hurt after they get sucked on? They didn't the first time she did it, and honestly I didn't get much pleasure from it. Could she have just done it too hard? She did leave some pretty dark hickeys that night elsewhere....hahah

Do tell her to try more gentle ...what works for her or the other woman she's been with doesn't work for her.  My example for this is that I DO understand that most women like penetration more than I do...while a finger or two will do at the right moments with the right lubrication..I just do NOT desire some of the more intense penetration that I know women usually enjoy (there have been exceptions to this though)..so in this I am a giver when I know thats what she needs...but if she surmises that I want that too, I have to tell her in some way that I am not like that...through body language, or whispered words.  With any lover ...communication helps and to whisper gently when she begins ..or...even...telling her in advance ...is to your advantage and wil be appreciated long term by her.  Yes ..some things in sex cause soreness ...and for some tolerance is higher or not.  For me, a little soreness where you mentioned is trade off for what I was enjoying ...but yes...I have had a woman be wayyyyy too rough with me and was so selfish I don't think she had a clue.  "I love the way you love me ...but please...no marks and ...a bit more gentle sometimes and help me to know what YOU need to get there for us both."    Explain that you are both new at this ..at least as a twosome...and you want to walk a long journey with her that is already wonderful and promises to be better each time you meet. 

That's all for now, but if I do decide to visit her this weekend, do you think you could help me figure out how to make a move on her? I think it'll be hard to not be that intimate for so long, but now I'm thinking the regret is harder to deal with. She says it was okay we stopped, but I know how much she wanted it. You can tell. I mean, I've gone without sex my whole life, but that feeling of being desired is so powerful....
I cant tell you when to "go" but ...if you feel the urge its ok to move by looking in her eyes and tell her "if we are going to pick up where we left off ...we need to catch up to where we were before don;t we ...and didn't it start with a kiss ?"   and take her lips against yours and let things happen the way you both shall be lead. 

.So..this is my two cents worth.   KNOW that sex with anyone is a risk.because you are making yourself vulnerable  to all kinds of feelings and the highs are soooooo high, but the hurt can be just as stark.  MY hope for you is for your mind and soul and heart ever more so than the orgasmic experience which may or may not happen ...but can be wonderful if its what you both want.


What advice would you give to the Marie's of the world ? and to ask me anything (Your identity will be secure) write me at akiss2desire@gmail.com

Wednesday

The "Moment" Of My Lesbian First Time - Share Yours


So many first time stories start with "we were so drunk" ... Silly. 

Mine was when I was 18 a woman who was several years older and had been a student teacher of mine a few years before ...longtime readers know my first time story is detailed and is published here and on several places on the internet   We had become acquaintances and then friends and were pursuing each other for several months before IT  finally happened. There are descriptions by everyone on here about what women do with each other ...and yes we did some of those things...(making out, fingering, oral, lots of boob play) but my major memory was when I realized I was dressing myself and fixing my hair and makeup for a date with a woman and that we were probably about to have sex ...MY first time with a woman.  When I was getting ready I was probably as excited as any time in my life ...with a WIDE range of emotions from trembling to the other side of the spectrum in total confidence that I was READY, and just praying that I was right that this was IT. . It was a morning rendezvous and  when I showed up at her door, she was still in her frumpy morning attire,  there was no doubt in her mind I was there and dressed to entice her....that the message I was sending was "I'm ready if you are."  

.The next "moment" for me was when I was between her legs and just getting ready to lower my head into her muff.  After years of fantasizing it was FINALLY going to happen. I was aware of every sense imaginable.   Visually ---it was a bit shocking at first to be sooooo up close to another woman's vagina, certainly a soft smell of her excitement, touch ...as I had fingered her gently and knew how wet she was for me, and how time almost stood still for that moment before I went down. That freeze frame is forever etched in my mind, as was the moment a minute later when I realized how much at home I was giving oral pleasure to a woman I cared about.  

So that's my first time  "Moment"  (actually didn't limit to one did I ?  Sorry) and I am curious to know what freeze frames from YOUR first time stay with you forever.  If you haven't done it, what are you most looking forward to ??.

Sunday

The time I got fisted by what I now realize is the one true lesbian love of my life.


I posted this on shybi because I was remembering the time I got it deep.   Wow ...I just couldnt stop remembering and having new feelings too.   Here it is :)
As some who have read my blog know, this happened to me ...the girl I was with and in the night when I can say without a doubt we were the most in love at that point, was much younger and had been thinking about it and hinting about it.  We talked about it after we broke up and she said she wanted to give me something nobody ever gave me   It was also a true test of something I had always said which is that I truly am not that into penetration.   This was penetration extreme. Whatever I type from this point on, I need to say this...I never loved her more in those moments when she was inside me ...we were never so close and I may never be that close to anyone ever.   I am not saying the act of fisting is what brought us that close ..in other words, if someone else does it to me it might not have the same effect.  It was the moment we were sharing.  

artistic lesbian fisting 
...I blogged about what happened and what it felt like in the moment, but in this forum I will say that I have thought so much about that night since.  I get very very very very wet so the lube thing was not a concern for either of us.  In times when she had 3 and 4 fingered me before the thought was crossing her mind that it was possible, and after reading about it and seeing it on computer had determined she was going to do it to me if possible ..and had picked out that particular night.   When she not only had the 4 finger going but also started putting pressure I started to realize she was probably testing the possibility and I did have to make a deciscion as to whether or not to obtject or let it happen.   I was relaxed with her and trusting her but still ...if I were thinking RATIONALLY would have told her to stop.  

In truth, where I made the choice to see if we were going to do it was when I went from on my back to when got on all fours and its hard to describe this position but she was reversed and I was able to reach into her while she was doing what she was doing, although my fingering was just keeping contact ....keeping touch of her for closeness.  .  I  helped her fingers back into me.and rocked with her.    Her soft boobs were on my back and we were so cuddled together.   While I realized she probably was about to attempt something and I was a little afraid, I think when I look back in the five minutes before it happened I thought "that will never happen."  But she was persistent in  both the in and out of me with all those fingers, but twisting her wrist and probing and pushing a bit harder.

While I felt the knuckle pressure pushing really hard, .  I am sure my moans were encouraging to her and she kept going.  ANd it was getting hot because my finger was getting to her and she was nearing orgasm.   I had mixed emotions about what was ready to happen and I think I only gave in to allowing it a split second before she was totally into me.  At my pussy I felt it POP in ..and yes there was a singe shot of pain there for a few seconds at first....almost a state of shock.   It was scary ...if I had to do it again I probably wouldn't be so scared.  It was like :"ok we've done this now what."  But I felt SO close to her and I know her to me while she was in me.  I twirled her pearl with my finger and rocked back and forth with her inside me.  My walls were involuntarily bearing down on her, but every single nerve ending on my entire body was singing....a feeling like I cannot describe ...aware of everything, and as I blogged, especially aware of my naked tits hanging and wanting to be touched so badly.   When I felt the need to stop, she must have felt comfortable and reallllllly went deep.   I remember an almost ugly sounding grunt....but also thinking "this is it ..remember this..remember this."  Yes I nearly passed out I think.   The full so full sensation was replaced by total emptiness when I asked her to stop.  "We have to stop now." She told me when we talked about it that my eyes had an animalistic quality afterwards. "I knew you would never be the same and I changed you forever...I had to find a way to do that because you changed me forever in so many other ways." 

Iam waiting for trust like that again ...that was the most magical night. 

Monday

Awakened to Giving Her Lesbian Oral, Clean Showered and Hanging Off The Bed

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Awakened to Giving Her Oral, Clean Showered and Hanging Off The Bed
by akiss2desire
All Rights Reserved 2013

I was sleeping so very hard on my side at side of the bed when you sat down and bounced the mattress springs after your shower.  I awakened next to the clean smell of your skin, very pleasant, and right next to me.  Still very hard and mostly asleep I adjusted to climb and replace my pillow with your newly shaven thigh, and irresistibly kissed the skin that  still held the moisture your towel hadn't sopped up.   You purred as I did this and leaned backward upon the bed, a motion that in and of itself slid my cheek upward on your thigh towards the nape.  Although I am still just a few batted eyelids away from deep sleep yet again, in this dream state nothing tastes better than the valley my lips are sucking upon.  I am torn between revisiting whatever dream I was having or creating a dream anew.   Your legs spread and you slightly shift your hips to the left so that without me exerting any effort my nose and upper lip is now on the moistness of your labia and the softness of your clean shaven V is heaven so near.  I only have to extend my tongue to part your lips and beckon your clit from under the hood. I open my mouth and you push into me with your nectar.   In this matter of a minute I have gone from deep sleep to having the wonderful feeling of your clit sliding between my lips to our mutual delight. You reach under me to grasp my breast in your palm and now I am completely in.  Its a soft and dull, still sleepy tingle on my senses, but it feels like I can feel each nerve coming alive and the ambrosia of your pretty pussy pulls me up and over your thigh to dive downwardly and slide my body next to yours to begin to make love to you with my mouth.  Licking hi and low, my cheeks enjoying the supreme softness where you just shaved, the ripples of your quivers down your thighs draped over the bed when my tongue tip clicks the perfect spot.  Your familiar pre orgasmic high pitched cry urges my fingers inside you and my tongue to begin its twisting ferocious finale. Arching into me and crying my name aloud your nails and fingertips dig into the skin of my shoulder.  I hold on for dear life with my lips with my tongue thrashing until it's done and I can slowly back us down.   Good wonderful morning my love.  

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