Who Am I ? akiss2desire is a Bible Belt Blogging Bi Big Beautiful Babe who has been sharing her writing, mostly 1st person lesbian erotica, short stories, poetry, and lesbian pop culture realizations from both the experience and fantasy perspectives to an ever growing audience. I recently passed a million page views ! Thanks for the nominations for the Lezzie awards honoring best lesbian erotica on the web.

Those who have come here regularly know that I have taken a bit of a hiatus from posting and publishing, but my past work is still here and if you are new here there is much to be consumed. I am working on several stories right now and writing from the same mix of experience and fantasy that readers have told me they loved.

Those stories will be the foundation of my upcoming compilation book. Today, you get to read for free. Welcome, and I hope you stay awhile.

Friday

Funny Cool Chick - Chelsea Handler of Chelsea Lately

I just wanted to share with the cool chicks here my newfound favoriteon TV is Chelsea Handler. She is a hilarious, ballsy bitch of a latenight talk show host who is doing things on her show "Chelsea Lately"that no other woman has ever done. There is much talk with thepanel (a more humorous and R rated version of the view)which usuallyincludes a comedian, and two others you may or may not have heardof. After that is a one on one interview with a C list celebrity,and then a comedy bit like what she has done for "Girls BehavingBadly" in the past.The bisexual and lesbian references are all over the place ..in lastnights episode alone (a repeat I think) there must have been 4-5,which include something I have never seen a talk show host on tv do,which is ask directly "are you bisexual..are you a lesbian?" with adaft sense of humor injected. Shea asked that of some actress I hadnever heard of, Bai Ling, who has the name "Bi" so that wasaddressed, and then she basically admitted she had slept withAngelina Jolie. Then Chelsea talked with Dennis Hof and BrookeTaylor of Cathouse on HBO, who have an open marriage she mocked totheir face basically while bringing out the nuances of how Brookesleeps with many women and couples on the show. Finally, Chelseawent to to a plastic surgeon for a comedy bit and got some kind oftreatment on her legs which apparently felt good to her, leading tomany flirtations and lewdish funny comments to the nurseadministering the treatment. The whole show was funny, naughty, anda tremendous guilty pleasure. Another episode she had out a vibratoron the set and when asked by an audience member how to have bettersex at home she said "replace the batteries." If you were to watch,you would see how comfortable she is just being real. So check herout..she is on E at 11:30 but I tivo her at 2:30 when it reruns.Funny Cool Chick. (and beautiful as well!)

Thursday

What is a First TIme???


I have always been interested in hearing about a woman's first time with another woman. I don't think I am alone in this because there are books about first times sold like this one called True Stories of Lesbian Awakening ... and there used to be a website that talked about anyone's first time having sex either hetero or not. I obviously have had my first time with men, first time with a woman ...but arent there more ways to understand first time ?


Yes there is a first time kiss but there are also the first times ...all these are the ones that have a special place with me as first times with a woman ...and hey..sometimes the woman was me :) There is a progression I want to go through for MY benefit..but I will share it on here with you..knowing I probably will leave something out.
First time I orgasmed while masturbating....I blogged about t his if you want to search it.

first time I saw women kiss on tv

first time I realized I was bisexual. ..I was 12 and there was no question at that moment or ever since of that being what was inside me.

soon after that was a first time of allowing myself to picture and imagine sex with girl while doing myself...I guess it is cliche but I thought of a teacher.

soon after that were times that I pictured a woman with me while making out or making love to a boy.

The FIRST TIME I KEPT A PAPERBACK ON MY BED FOR ABOUT 6 MONTHS BECAUSE IT HAD ONE CHAPTER IN IT THAT I READ OVER AND OVER AND OVER !!! (no for the life of me I can't remember the book .but as soon as I do I will post it here)


First time I let a crush on a girl lead to coming out and coming on to her ..was met with rejection


first experience with a vibrator.


Then there was the first time I saw lesbian pornography ..first in a magazine ...but about a week later saw the first VHS with two women together ..I can honestly say I have never been the same since either one of those experiences ....and I always wonder how many women ..e.ven straight women ..prefer to see F2F sex portrayed in that kind of movie.

My first lesbian love letter to she who became my first lover.


The list of firsts on that day should maybe only count as one ..first time kiss, first time feeling her respond to the things I do to give her pleasure, fist time feeling a nipple stiffen between my lips and the first time knowing what someone elses wetness besides my own was like.


Ohhhh the first time going down on a woman ..when I knew that I truly belonged down there and never wanted it to end. Nothing before or since felt so good and so right to me. I really do wonder how I came out of that experience calling myself bisexual instead of gay.

first time I finally let myself go with a woman and could soar without the tension


first time I sought out a lesbian chatroom and found someone to cyber with.


first online lesbian love


first phone sex with a woman.

first blind date with woman--well sort of blind...we had met on the internet

oh...and first lesbian blog (this is my second one ..I erased the first one about a year ago)

The things that have yet to be??? now that sounds like the topic for another list sometime :)










I went down,

felt her respond

...first time I let my body go with a woman without such tension

...first time I tried something kinky or unusual ....

first time I was truly surprised in bed is a good memory for me.

first cybersex .....

first F2F phone sex

As someone who has been married for 7 years I cannot say that everytime in some way is a bit of a first time because it certainly is not with him. But I also have to admit that

Monday

She knows I want her and now she knows I can't get her out of my mind. I look at her skin and examine every freckle, every fingertip, every eyelash in the thought that she is soooo completely what I have wanted for so long. I realize I am in the presence of my lifelong fantasy and long to make eye contact with her. As SOON as that happens, I long for it again. I dream about a kiss ...we talk some more with me being able to go on in this pretense for everyone else who observes that I am a married straight mom and she is a single straight woman ...but my mind never seems to let me get very far away of dreaming that she should be able to somehow hear my thoughts. Hasnt she noticed me staring at her breasts ...how can she put up with me when I am the ditz I become when I glaze over when I look into her eyes. How can I tell if I am to her what she is to me. I dream that she is better and more than I ever dreamed of. For her I give all myself in bed ...all my heart, emotion, and affection in hopes that when she is away from me she will think of me and long for my tongue against hers.

Tuesday

Update on A Lesbian Video To Share via YouTube

I first wrote about my feelings about finding a very tender and erotic video unlike others that I have seen on youtube awhile back and solicited comments on how it made YOU feel when you watched it. I broke it down scene by scene, and didn't really expect anyone to do exactly what I did, but amongst the nice, however mono-syllabic responses with a predictable "it was good" and from a male "have you ever done that ?" (what ...kissed a girl ??? silly) I did get one jewel of a response from someone enlightened , erotic, and tuned in. I have asked her permission to post this and she gladly responded yes ... If you are new here and want to go back to the start, my original blog-post was at http://alesbiankiss2desire.blogspot.com/2007/07/commentary-on-lesbian-kiss-video-to.html.

A woman with introspect and an enlightened view writes:

Hey Brenda...First off, let me say that I loved the video.
Actresses or not, they made it very believable. It's something I'd
show my male friends or straight female friends when they ask what
it's like when two women kiss. Second, that's quite the detailed
synopsis you give on how the video unfolds, introspective for sure.
Now, my observations: I've always liked it when les couples have
contrasting hair colors and/or styles. I think it points out the fact
that two very different individuals can come together for something
beautiful when obvious attraction is involved. The eye contact is
amazing. This may have been a "staged" video but when they exchange
some of the glances they do I think they took great pleasure in
making it. I also liked the contrast in their lips. The brunette has
full, slightly darker lips whereas the blonde has thin pink ones and
neither seems to overwhelm the other, they take turns initiating each
kiss. The frenching was also well done. So many
> people are under the impression that when two women kiss it always
leads to tonsil-hockey marathons, which we all know isn't the case. I
also loved how they held hands in the upright, fisted position. My
partner and I love to do this when we kiss. It always rekindles
memories of past lovemaking because we both love to hold the other
down this way and just kiss for endless moments. And finally, when
the brunette gently bites her lower lip a couple times it absolutely
sends me thru the roof. It's one of the few "perceived" lesbian
actions that I actually wish I could experience more often. It's so
coy, girly and passive/aggressive, I just love it. Well, there you
go, my dissertation on the video. Hope that it was enlightening for
some and not to boring for anyones tastes.


Thank you for writing the response I hoped I would get when I posted that. Honest and erotic with the taste of your true experience.

Words.

Thank you for your gift of them to me. :)

Pictures and video show us so much ...but attach words to them and it cycles a whole different range of emotions ..much deeper. YOU are a much deeper person than most...I know this without having met you ...but your words inspire me to use mine to make people feel ...feel something .. FEEL something ...as your words made me feel. It is something to find a video that, despite being so staged, thanks to the actresses involved, doesn't look so much. I think they found something ..or had something going in ..and I wonder if they took it farther. Frenching. It absolutely zings me when a woman uses this term to describe a deep passionate kiss. I almost never ..almost never see "frenching" in any of the literature I read. Hand holding ..."upright fisted position" .... I think very few understand that hands ..to a woman who loves woman ..the vision of hands ..are studied as carefully as more traditional sexual images ...the hands are IT as much as lips, skin and in these images of women in passionate and intimate moment, eyes.

I LOVE what you shared with me

Wednesday

Tribadism for the curious lesbians :)











Tribadism is something I have been so very interested in in a long long time. In my very limited experiences it hasn't really happened to me yet , but I aim to change that. I have, I think, incorrectly called it scissoring ...a better description is what we use to call dry humping in high school ...except...hell not it's not dry at all in this scenario.

It looks so good and I fantasize about it all the time.

I don't think it counts the time I grinded my vulva against my girlfriends thigh and made it that way ...although that was very erotic ...where I want it to go is pubic to pubic. Here is the thing...I KNOW this would get me off ..but I am so reluctant to do things so much for just me.


Monday

A Lesbian Kiss :)



I saw this cute graphic for a Lesbian Love tshirt or something and wanted to pass it along. I was on vacation last week and had much time for fantasizing but no time at a computer to jot it all down. The next few posts may require a cigarette after reading ...even if you don't smoke after sex (I don't know I never looked is NOT an appropriate answer)

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